So… What Is Stimming?
Understanding the movements and behaviours that help our brains feel just right
If your child flaps their hands, rocks back and forth, spins, hums, jumps, fidgets or watches things move repeatedly, you might have wondered:
“Why do they do that?”
You might even have been told that it’s something they need to stop.
But what if, instead of seeing these behaviours as something to eliminate, we became curious about what they might be doing for your child?
This is where stimming comes in.
Stimming is a way our bodies can help our brains regulate, process information and feel just right.
And before we go any further, here's something important:
Everyone stims.
So… what exactly is stimming?
Stimming is short for self-stimulatory behaviour. It refers to repetitive movements, sounds or actions that provide sensory input or help someone regulate their nervous system.
Your brain is processing information all day, every day.
Sounds.
Lights.
Movement.
Touch.
Thoughts.
Emotions.
Excitement.
Worry.
Boredom.
Social interactions.
That is a LOT for one nervous system to manage.
Sometimes your brain essentially says:
“WOAH. That’s a lot.” 🫠
And your body looks for a way to help.
That might be through movement, sound, touch or repetition.
Some examples can include:
Any of these are stimming.
But isn’t stimming something autistic children do?
It can be - but stimming isn't exclusive to autistic or neurodivergent people.
Think about your own habits.
- Have you ever bounced your leg during a meeting?
- Twisted your hair while thinking?
- Doodled while listening?
- Tapped your fingers?
- Paced around the kitchen while trying to remember what you walked in there for?
- Or listened to the same song approximately 47 times because it just felt right? 🎵
Yep.
You're stimming too.
The difference is that some people's stimming is more noticeable than others.
For neurodivergent children, stimming can sometimes be more frequent, more noticeable, or play a particularly important role in helping them regulate their nervous system.
So… why do children stim?
There isn't one single reason.
Stimming can serve different purposes for different people — and even for the same child at different times.
It might help them:
🧠 Focus
🌱 Regulate their nervous system
😊 Express excitement or happiness
😌 Feel calm and organised
💥 Release energy
❤️ Feel comfortable and safe
👀 Manage sensory input
Sometimes stimming can help a child manage an environment that feels overwhelming.
Sometimes it helps them stay alert enough to concentrate.
Sometimes they're excited.
Sometimes they're bored.
Sometimes it simply feels good.
And sometimes, we might not know the reason — and that's okay too.
Reframing stimming
This is where we can shift the question.
Instead of:
“How do I get them to stop doing that?”
Try:
“I wonder what this is doing for them?”
Because the behaviour we can see is only part of the story.
The hand flapping might look unusual to us.
But for your child, it might be helping them manage or express excitement.
The rocking might look distracting.
But the rhythmic movement might be helping them feel calm.
The constant movement might look like they're not listening.
But it might actually be helping them process information as they listen.
This is why simply stopping a stim without understanding its purpose can sometimes remove an important regulation strategy without giving the child another way to meet that need.
Does that mean we should never stop a stim?
Not necessarily.
There are times when we may need to step in.
If a behaviour is causing injury, putting someone at risk, significantly preventing participation, or communicating that a child is becoming overwhelmed, we need to understand what is happening and consider what support they need.
But the goal shouldn't automatically be:
“Stop stimming.”
Instead, we want to ask:
“What is their body telling us?”
and
“What support could we provide?”
Sometimes the answer might be reducing sensory input.
Sometimes it might be offering movement.
Sometimes it might be providing a different sensory tool, that has a similar input to the stimming action they are doing.
Sometimes it might simply be allowing the child to stim safely.
The aim is not to make a child's behaviour look more “normal.”
The aim is to help their nervous system feel safe, regulated and supported.
Before you say “Stop doing that…”
Pause.
Take a moment to wonder what your child's body might be communicating.
Are they overwhelmed? Excited? Seeking movement? Trying to concentrate? Trying to block something out? Trying to calm themselves? Or simply enjoying the sensation?
We don't always have to understand a behaviour immediately.
We can get curious before we get corrective.
Because sometimes the thing that looks a little unusual from the outside…
is actually the thing helping their brain cope on the inside. 🌱
Different doesn't automatically mean wrong.
And sometimes, that little movement, sound or rhythm is exactly what a child needs to feel more comfortable in their body and ready to participate in their world.
Stimming isn't something we need to fear.
It's something we can learn to understand.
—
Tricia Lerk
Paediatric Occupational Therapist
Director, Planted Parenting 🌱